This seems to be a bit of a carry-over of theme from the last post: talking is a different thing from doing. The same theme comes up in sermons in churches on Sunday mornings and in scripture itself; it comes up in feminist discussions and writings. In science, a theory is only a hypothesis until it is tested and proven. We seem to not always have the same standards in other disciplines....
Living is messy business. If you're in the pit, you're going to fight and subsequently see, taste, hear, smell, and feel blood; you might even bleed. Theorizing is sanitized. Even planning is clean.
You've heard about Hopeprint 2 posts ago. I received a communication today from the director that mentioned bedbugs...
You must understand that bedbugs are on my "Top Ten Most Dreaded Non-Lethal Things" list. They almost made the "Top Ten Most Dreaded Things EVER" list, but putting them in the same company as anthrax and ebola seemed melodramatic. Realistically they probably fit in better with pigeons. Trust me when I say we should leave that alone.
Anyway, in previous work I did there was high chance of me picking up bedbugs and I took elaborate precautions. Not only are bedbugs just icky, they are IMPOSSIBLE to get rid of. Dreadful things usually are ridiculously hardy. Like, can-live-10-years-on-a-hard-surface-hardy. Or, hustling-humans-out-of- their-hamburgers-hardy... wait, I said I would leave that alone!
I like to think I have been a safe distance from bedbugs lately. I make my husband help me check for bedbugs every time we enter a hotel. I mean, I'm the one who when the note from the school nurse comes home saying a child in the school has a case of head lice (not nearly as hardy as bedbugs and 10 times easier to get rid of) immediately throws everything my children had on them in sealed plastic bags and check their hair three times a day for the next 4 weeks. This communication I received almost made me pick up the phone and tell Cathy and Nicole and everyone "So sorry - I forgot I'm busy every Tuesday night for the rest of the year."
And then I felt a Divine whisper: "Hypocrite."
Locking ourselves in, sealing ourselves away is not living. Living is not safe. Living in a way that seeks justice for all is most definitely NOT SAFE. But as a child, I was sometimes guilty of hiding really near home base so the distance to safety would be short. As a teenager, I was sometimes guilty of not trying out for something for fear of failure. As a mom, I am sometimes guilty of making the decision that keeps my daughters out of harm's way instead of the one that will provide an opportunity for growth. I fight the urge to stay safe more often than I would like to admit, even this many years and lessons into life.
I deeply believe that being involved in the mission of Hopeprint is a natural extension of my values and beliefs and is something I need to be involved in. People needing hope and love is bigger than sanitation: pretty Un-American and Un-the-family-I-was-reared-in and honestly, Un-me. I like sanitation. But if we all gave into our fears all of the time, evils of all kind would prevail.
Who's afraid of a little bedbug?
Me. Totally.
But I'm going anyway.
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