How about if Mondays is our day to explore feminist writings? We're ready to work hard on Mondays, right?!
Today: Audre Lorde's "The Master's Tools Will Never Dismantle the Master's House." Lorde's point in this article is that women often try to downplay differences amongst us rather than celebrating them. She comes from the perspective that the world has tried power as domination, an "old and primary tool of all oppressors to keep the oppressed occupied with the master's concerns." When I read this essay, I heard that the world doesn't need more domination, it needs a new model, one that the "womanly" attributes considered weaker and less effective like nurturing and vulnerability might have a place in this discussion. (Or otherwise stated, the biblical theme of strength being found in weakness). She argues that the systems of domination fear connectedness of women. Why?
Tiger mom vs. Helicopter mom. Stay at home mom vs. career mom. Fashionista vs. Granola. Single woman vs. married woman. Natural birth proponents vs. (um, I'm not sure what the official title is for the other side). Republicans vs. Democrats (are you starting to feel this?) Mainline vs. Evangelical. Creationist vs. Evolutionist. Lesbian vs. Heterosexual. I'm guessing I might have named at least one issue that raised your blood pressure a wee bit, one where you aren't interested in conceding any middle ground.
I propose that there is a middle ground in all of these issues, and that it doesn't even have to include casting off your firm beliefs. I can personally attest to actual middle ground being found in the Fashionista/Granola model;) We don't have to all reach the same conclusions to be able to nurture one another. We can be interdependent and we can support one another in our differences, don't you think? Lorde suggests that differences can be viewed as polarities which can spark our creative energies. "Only within that interdependency of different strengths, acknowledged and equal, can the power to seek new ways of being in the world generate, as well as the courage and sustenance to act where there are no charters" (Lorde).
I'm not sure how to conclude this. I thought about asking if you would find Lorde's quotes less pertinent if you knew she identified as a black lesbian. Would you be willing to admit that the woman who took a different mothering road than you is a good mom? I think I'll end with a challenge for us to imagine a woman who is on the opposite side of one of the fences we find important and try to pinpoint some way she is making the world a better place.
i am moved by lorde's quote. i have recently re-written my own personal mission statement to be a cross between the greatest commandment and my favorite quote by dostoevsky:
ReplyDelete"To love a person means to see him as God intended him to be."
and though i do not agree with dostoevsky on many issues (as he is a noted anti-semite) i feel he has captured my greatest quest... to look beyond the face, beyond appearances, even beyond actions - to the heart. see the good that God has placed there and love it.
the rest is circumstantial.
Well said. Thanks for sharing that great quote! Don't you wonder how someone who comes up with such a profound definition of love can not love an entire people group? And just so I can hold my head up in my Feminist Theories class: he should have included "her" ;)
ReplyDeleteAnd by the way, I think your life reflects your mission statement.
So much of this catches my attention but none more than, "She argues that the systems of domination fear connectedness of women." I have always said that their is a magic that happens when a group of women gather in a common cause. I ponder that statement and think of many revolutions against unjust causes, governments or laws started by men and women of all races, ethnic backgrounds, cultures, locations and I thinking, wow, magic.
ReplyDeleteIn regards to finding commonalities between women. Personally, I feel like my own maturity has made it possible to find dear friends in "categories" I would have never expected based on my own "categories". I find now that I am a better listener, better at disagreeing without anger or hurt feelings and blessed by the varying perspectives.
Whew, my brain hurts now.
www.mother-flippin.blogspot.com
Maybe this is just me, but I feel like nothing could have prepared me for motherhood. (But motherhood has prepared me for so many other things.) It's just so foreign to anything I've ever done. I have no idea how to do things "right." I do my best. I try to gain wisdom. But I don't know. It's amazing the depths of insecurity that parenting has drawn out in me. And I think therein lies the root of at least A problem. I'm not sure what I'm doing is good. I see someone else doing something different. Instead of trying to learn from that example, I immediately spring to my own defense. And isolate myself from that different perspective.
ReplyDeleteBut what a terrible way to interact.
Our sermon Sunday was about the body of Christ. How, by embracing our differences, we are all stronger. How Christ's body is not a homogeneous set of arms or eyes or kidneys. It takes all kinds.
I accept your challenge.
There's a mom who blames me for a kid running into my car door. I'll admit, I've been a bit shivery toward her about it (not in practice, because I've never really talked to her. just in my cold heart.) But I know that she values buying local, conservation, supporting organic agriculture. I'll try to remember that the next time I want to say, "Seriously, she ran into the door all by herself."
(I know all that about her from her bumper stickers. What if she's driving a borrowed car?) :)
I love this. I love reading all this stuff from all of you. Tash, I think it's magic too. The kind of magic that was implied in "abundant life," the kind we were meant to live.
ReplyDeleteAmanda, its always easier to theorize than practice, and sharing practice's specifics is even harder. Thank you. I'll try to find you an Audre Lorde bumper sticker to slap on your car that girlfriend can read when you pull in front of her in line.